You
Did Not See My Pain
You did not see the
pain
That the little girl
had inside
who knew only the
orphan way of life
She had no mother
she was told
and all of the bad
things
that were said to
her are still in her head
about her mother who
was just a child
The little girl
wished that she could have been
her mother's child.
You did not see the
fear in me
as you walked by me
swinging a stick
behind your back
then out it would
come
without a sound
and the swish of the
whip
as it came across my
back
then the screams of
pain
which I knew you
heard
But never did I hear
a kind word from you
You did not see the
torment in my
as the years went by
you have permanently
left the scars
on my body and soul
You used me as a
scapegoat
as you made me bare
the blame for others
without a word for
my defense
as I was never
heard.
You did not see the
pain in my Heart
as you stole it from
me years gone by
to live from day to
day
without God's love
to hide and sneak
around the Place
so no one could find
me
to hit me and hurt
me again
because there was no
place to hid.
You did not see my
shame
as you put the dunce
hut on my head
while on the stool
I had to sit in the
corner
and each and every
child
was told to laugh at
me
because of the
spelling I got wrong
which was the start
of me
not having a friend.
You did not see the
humiliation in me
each night with
three nuns
who thrashed me
as they stripped me
naked
of all clothes
tied me hand and
feet to each end of the bed
and then made me
kneel down
with my head on the
floor
to apologize for the
wrong I did not do.
You did not see in
me
the little innocent
girl I was
who was hurting deep
inside
because the walking
dead was I
because the little
child in me
was gone for ever
more.
You did not see my
innocence in me
as my innocence was
taken away from me
by the lay workers,
nuns and a priest
who did not care for
the child
who cried most
nights on the floor
and beside her bed
she did pray
for Jesus and Mary
to take her away.
You did not see my
grieving Heart and Soul
because of been
unfairly treated
the ugly, distorted,
harsh
and unpleasant
thrashings
I got over the bed
at night times
with very severe
painful injuries
I received from you
all.
You did not see my
Heart
which bled with
torment inside
as you ripped my
heart out of me
so many years ago
and no love was
shown to me as a child
Because without a
mother's love
A child's souls dose
not grow.
You did not see the
spiritual Abuse
which you put me
through
from day to day
as each day you
talked of God
with hate
Who shall show no
mercy
to us little
children
and that hell was
where
we would all go when
we die
without knowing the
true God.
You did not see how
with your tongue
The verbal abuse
took it's hold on me
which your words cut
me to the core
with your tongue so
bad and hurtful
in front of all my
peers to hear.
You did not see
because of my bed wetting
you made it worse
by demeaning me of
the cold baths
which you put me in
and rubbing my nose
and face
in the wet sheets
which you then made
me wear
around my head at
breakfast time
standing out in
front of the room
for all to see.
Please God!
Forgive them
for they knew
exactly
what they had done
to all of the
little, unwanted innocent children
in all the catholic
orphanages around the world
who are now shouting
out for justice to be done.
For the world to
hear the truth
about the abuse to
us all.
That was done in
God's name
by the men and women
of the cloth
who showed no mercy
to the little
parent-less children
who had no where to
hide.
Copyright@
2001 Ann Thompson
All
Rights Reserved